at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
