Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize