she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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