God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize