i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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