He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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