also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
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