Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
