Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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