Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
