i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
