Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
