Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
