he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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