so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
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