sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize