He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
