I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
try to milk me bitch
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
