My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I think your dad took our porno
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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