so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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