Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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