Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
