'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
God I need to hump something, right now.
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