I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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