i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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