Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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