would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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