i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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