last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Randomize
