Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
