Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
