She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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