there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
