so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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