Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
