using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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