good thing vaginas are great cup holders
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
