i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
