"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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