Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
