sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I got her a Nickelback box set.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
