new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
