And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Say something about gay babies.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Randomize
