just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
