i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Randomize
