Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
