That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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