dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just pee around me
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
