Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
