dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
