He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
