I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Randomize